7 1/2 month Update

Silas is now almost 7 1/2 months old. It blows me away how fast time is going! Here are some highlights!

• We started baby food. I made all of it and most of it he loves!
   He LOVES:
     *Peaches
     *Apples
     *Pears
     *Plums
     *Bananas
     *Butternut Squash
     *Sweet Potatoes
     *Carrots
     *Mandarin Oranges

  He HATES:
     *Green beans - puréed or small pieces
     *Blueberries


• He shakes his head no ALL THE TIME!

• He rolls everywhere he wants to get, but refuses to even try crawling.

• He has recently become obsessed with tags, he can find it on anything in no time.

• He reaches for me when someone else is holding him. I love it and it melts my heart!

• He sits like a champ and plays with lots of toys all by himself.

• He loves the Excersaucer and Allen is pretty sure he is going to break it from jumping so hard.

• He loves being outside, he is so content out there! I don't know what we are going to do this winter...

• His personality comes out more and more everyday. He is quite the little ham.

• When he wants attention, he fake coughs. And it is adorable!

• He know has 3 teeth and is working on the 4th. The bottom middle 2 came in a couple of months ago and now he has the top on next to the middle one and is working on the same tooth on the other side. He looks kind of goofy but we still love him to pieces!

Loves the Excersaucer!

Watching the Packer game of course!

Such a happy little man!

Deep in thought.

What could he be pondering? :)

6 month old little man

Silas,
 You officially turned 6 months old last Sunday. I can't believe we have had you for half of a year already! You are such a big boy...weighing in at 18.1 pounds, you have so much chub on your legs, when we give you a bath you have to move the rolls to clean between them - chunky little man :) You holler all the time, at anything and everything. I feel bad for your toys because you are either hollering at them or throwing them. Let's hope your social skills get better before you try to make friends :).

Yesterday, I fed you avocados for the first time. This is your first "real" food and here is a photo of what you thought of it...obviously not impressed with the initial taste, but you ate the entire half of it!

Your faces were absolutely hilarious while you were eating it, but you opened your mouth for more every time! Goofy goofy boy!

Today, I finally got you to sit long enough to get a picture of it, and you made an adorable face while I snapped a picture - you little cutie pie!

We love you to pieces and love watching you grow and change before our eyes! Happy 6 months my little man!

Love you,

 Mommy

Mr. Silas

Si,
 I can't believe you are almost 6 months old! It is absolutely crazy how fast time goes and how fast you grow. You have your bottom 2 teeth now, and it was pretty easy on all of us. I have heard awful stories about teething, but besides the disgusting diapers that you forced Mommy to change, it was pretty much a breeze! It amazes me how fast you learn things too...you are so active (and rough) in your Excersaucer already. If I hand you an extra toy while you are in it, you now chuck it across the room and giggle. Between that and the room clearing farts you have had lately, there is NO DOUBT you all boy! Your Daddy is so proud when your fart takes my breath away while I am feeding you - you could at least wait until I can get away from the toxic fumes you little stinker! You are almost sitting up by yourself and I bet by the time Auntie Teri gets here for Christmas you will be able to do it - if she puts you down at all in those 2 weeks she is home :) I know she misses you a lot and can't wait to see you again so give her lots of big smiles when she gets here ok?! You could also give her one of your growl hugs that you give me all day - love them! Whenever I pick you up, especially after changing your diaper, you wrap your little arms around me and squeeze while growling into my shoulder. I think it is adorable and your uncles (Paul and Daniel) think it is hilarious!

Your Daddy and I love you to pieces and love watching you grow and learn new things pretty much everyday!

Love,
 Mommy

A Love Letter for Little Man

I love hearing you in the morning, giggling and cooing in your crib, just waiting patiently for me to come and get you. That huge smile I get when I peek over your crib melts me every time. When you snuggle into my neck when I pick you up just about melts me into a puddle. I am sooo in love with you. The older you get, the more you interact with me. Your giggles make me giggle, which makes you giggle more. I love when you grunt to reach your toes over your little belly...so cute! You are getting really rough when you play with your toys, but you are a boy, so I guess I should just get used to it! Everything is funny to you, even just looking at you sometimes makes you belly laugh. You are such a ham! I think you have figured out that when you are silly, you get attention, and you are silly all the time. I love the way you cuddle when you are sleepy, laying your head on my shoulder and just chilling. You are such a sweet boy. I love very minute I spend with you and watching you grow and learn brings tears to my eyes. You are growing so fast and I love watching you learn and discover new things. You are such a sweet baby. In fact, someone told me the other day that you should be in commercials because you are so cute, and that her kids were never that cute! That sure made me smile! Everywhere we go, people stop to tell us how cute you are, so it must be true! I love you to pieces and can't look forward to watching you continue to grow and learn!

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Such a happy little man!

Love those cheeks! They are so fun to cover in kisses!

Peeking out of the shower at Mommy!

Getting those toes, I can hear the grunt just looking at this picture!

Being Mommy

Being a mom these last 17 weeks has been the most amazing time in my life. I can't think of a time I learned more, was so incredibly tired and functioning at the same time, and have been scared pretty much everyday. Being a mommy is terrifying. I have been run across two families in the last few weeks who have lost their babies unexpectedly. One baby girl at 3 months and one baby girl at 8 weeks. I can't imagine losing Silas. I check on him constantly when he naps now. These stories scare the crap out of me. How can you put a perfectly healthy baby down for a nap and they never wake up? How does a good God allow that kind of pain to happen. I can't imagine my life without Silas - much less how incredibly guilty I would feel if that happened to him "on my watch." Looking at that little man when he smiles at me is the greatest feeling. Nothing compares to the fullness I feel in my heart when he starts giggling at me - scrunching up his nose, eyes squinty, legs up, all out giggling. I don't want to ever go a day without hearing that giggle. He is my little man and the thought of losing him terrifies me every day. I don't want to/can't imagine going back to not being "Mommy." The thought of it really scares me.

Another thing that amazes me about being a mom is how much you can love your child immediately. There is no waiting period to see how you feel about this little person. I thought I loved him before he was born, but as soon as I heard that little cry in the delivery room, I was more in love than I have ever been in my life. Before I saw him, I knew I loved him. When they laid him in my arms, I thought my heart was going to explode. And I love the little man more every day. It is crazy to me that it works that way. He can't tell me he loves me with him voice yet, but I swear that in his adorable little smile, you can see it in his eyes. "I love you Mommy" is what I see in those smiles share at 4:00 in the morning when my little monster decides he is hungry. He is so precious and sweet and I just love him to pieces.

The thought of losing him keeps me from sleeping. I know that God is in control and it is all going to work out the way He has planned, but it just scares me. I have a high school classmate that has experienced to much loss in her life. She has lost 3 babies...I can't even imagine how bitter that could make a person. But she has come through it with so much faith - it literally amazing me when I read her blogs. Sadly, I don't think I would have that kind of reaction when placed in her position. I look up to her so much, and envy her kind of faith. If you would have asked me in high school what I envied about her, it would have been her friends and popularity, but today, none of that really matters. Her faith is amazing to me and I hope that someday I will have a faith like that. Another classmate I had in grade school has shown me what faith as a mother looks like. She has a baby soon after Silas was born, but she had a lot of problems. She is home now, but has all this equipment and trach changes and all sorts of things new moms shouldn't have to deal with. I am blown away by her caringbridge updates. She talks about the devotions she is doing, the prayers she prays for her precious baby girl. I can't imagine being in her position and having so much faith. It makes me feel like a horrible Christian. I have so much to be thankful for in my perfectly healthy baby boy, but I am almost too scared to be thankful for it - always wondering if something is going to go wrong.

I guess its part of being a mom - worrying about your child. I just need to remember to give my worry to God, because it's all in His control anyway. That is something I need to start working on...big time.

Long Over-Due Update

To say that life has changed would be an understatement! So much has happened since I last posted!

Silas Ruben joined us on May 11, 2012 after an interesting delivery. I ended up with preeclampsia and was put on magnesium, which I am sure comes directly from the devil. That stuff is not a fun time! He came in weighing 7 lbs, 13 oz and 21.5 inches long! I asked the nurse if she was sure he was mine because I didn't expect him to be that big!

Think his daddy is proud of him? Notice I cut myself out of the picture...preeclampsia makes you swell more than you ever thought you could - that combined with 3 hours of pushing doesn't make for great photos!

Adorable little man!

Such a tiny little taco baby :)

This is at about 3 months old - such a happy little man!

This is my husband's favorite picture so far. It was his first time trying cereal - I don't think he knew quite what to think about it!

I will never get sick of seeing this adorable smile!

Pure naughty - what could he be plotting at such a young age?!

My happy little man!

Love him!

I love my new life. I love staying home and watching my son grow and learn new things. As much as I loved my job and couldn't imagine what life would be like without it, I can't say I would change my decision. I love hearing his coos and laughs all day. He is such a happy, talkative baby. I love the feeling I get when I catch him watching me walk across the room with a big grin on his face. I love the "conversations" we have all day long! He is such a little talker (wonder where he gets that from?) I can't remember what life was like without him! Every day he does something new and exciting! Today he is 4 months old and I love him more every second!

I have some AMAZING news! This little cutie is due May 5! I am 23 weeks and 3 days pregnant and feeling great! God answers prayers (and maybe tries to teach this anxious mama some patience at the same time!) We couldn't be more excited to meet this little one!